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Some of YOU Parents Suck. And So Do Your Children.

I’m just going to say it. Some of you parents suck. And so do your children, but it’s not their fault because you sucked first.

Let me explain.

Once upon a time, when I was a child, I disrespected my parents and they whooped my ass. Skip forward to thirty-eight years old, and I’m now considered a decent human being.  The end.

Seriously, at what point have we (“we” aka “some parents”) stopped being parents to the assholes “we’ve” (😉) created? (to be fair, my kids are assholes, too, but not for the same reasons.) Two days ago, as I was punishing my fifteen year old, I found myself reminding him that I was not placed on this earth to be his friend.  I was given the responsibility of being his parent, and that doesn’t always mean he gets his way. 

Guess what. He got mad, went to his bedroom, and fifteen minutes later, he went to work with his dad and me before enjoying a lovely family dinner.  No tantrums. No attitude. No grudge or chip on his shoulder for not getting his way.  “How on earth could you have said “no” to something that was such a big deal to him, and he not have an attitude the rest of the day,” you might ask.  The answer is simple.  We don’t care (and he’s a boy, ha!).

We do not negotiate consequences. One of my favorite phrases is, “the conversation is dead, break out the casket!” It goes something like this:

Me: Your grades suck.

30 minutes later…

Child: Mom can I go to …

Me: No.

Child: B…

Me: The conversation is dead, break out the casket!

Did you notice — I didn’t explain myself in any of the twelve words I used? They understand the rules and we enforce them. There are no exceptions…no negotiations…no lengthy conversation about “why” because they already know, and I freaking HATE repeating myself! Hate it.

This is why I am completely blown away by the extent to which some parents go in order to be their child’s friend.  It’s insane, and this is ultimately why some of you suck in the parenting department, and why your kids suck, too.

I recently overheard a conversation from high school students regarding parents that are buying Juuls and Juul pods for their TEENAGE children. I wasn’t necessarily invited to that conversation, but as a PARENT, I’m nosy, it’s how I roll. It’s what we do to stay in the know, like it or not.

Now, I may not be completely well versed in the language or slang of the week these days, but I do know contributing to addiction and cancer is NOT lit.  Juuls are exactly what called them — “a wolf in sheep’s clothing” and parents that are buying these for their children are exposing them to nicotine (yes, they do contain nicotine, according to the FDA, Forbes and addiction and other harmful chemicals. According to the FDA, “Among middle and high school students, 3.62 million were current users of e-cigarettes in 2018.”

Whaaaaaaat? That means there are 3.62 million children either blowing smoke up their parents’ asses, (I couldn’t resist!) or their parents are buying the pods.  Either way, you both suck, and ultimately the lack of care these “parents” have for their children, and the lack of care these children have for themselves, makes it difficult for parents that do attempt to protect their children, because it has become such a trend that it’s everywhere they turn, and peer pressure is a bitch. As if my job isn’t hard enough!

So, what can “we” do then? In case you missed my explanation in paragraph three, the answer is simple. Discipline your children. Stop negotiating consequences and stop being their friend.  The end.

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